We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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