you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
