Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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