shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
