I wish I only lived at night.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
