How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Randomize
