is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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