I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
