remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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