ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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