I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
