bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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