I'm drive I can fine osifer
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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