if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
i think i just lost a toe
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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