Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize