Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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