if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
how does that bad decision feel?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
