She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
third nipple confirmed
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Randomize
