So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Randomize
