hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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