Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
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I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
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we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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