I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
We were destined to go to rehab together
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
