The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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