I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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