when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Oh god it's open bar.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
