Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
