I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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