I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
