im gay
i know
yea but for you.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
