I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
