fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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