i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
