god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
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