Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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