Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
