I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize