she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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