it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
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just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
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if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize