would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
