Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
