i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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