I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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