Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'

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(917): apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money' http://tfl.nu/vf8t

Replies (4) Good night (2219) Bad night (956)
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(805): View more from California

An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.

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(805): An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice. http://tfl.nu/s7hm

Replies (19) Good night (4717) Bad night (1041)
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(408): View more from California

just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious

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(408): just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious http://tfl.nu/av2y

Replies (11) Good night (4614) Bad night (686)
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(301): View more from Maryland

the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"

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(301): the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst" http://tfl.nu/u5av

Replies (16) Good night (7984) Bad night (1163)
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(971): View more from Oregon

one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.

(706): View more from Georgia

i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...

(971): View more from Oregon

it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.

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(971): one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull. (706): i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer... (971): it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible. http://tfl.nu/efvs

Replies (9) Good night (4298) Bad night (1031)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge

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(203): just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge http://tfl.nu/b456

Replies (10) Good night (1103) Bad night (6976)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton

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(860): I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton http://tfl.nu/cmqr

Replies (2) Good night (3481) Bad night (989)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.

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(608): He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles. http://tfl.nu/pu4v

Replies (20) Good night (3720) Bad night (1226)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin

(774): View more from Massachusetts

He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying

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(774): Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin (774): He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying http://tfl.nu/waxr

Replies (3) Good night (2107) Bad night (667)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again

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(978): No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again http://tfl.nu/wayk

Replies (1) Good night (982) Bad night (538)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..

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(201): The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in.. http://tfl.nu/ctm0

Replies (5) Good night (1333) Bad night (652)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...

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(902): He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it... http://tfl.nu/at35

Replies (6) Good night (1887) Bad night (671)
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(317): View more from Indiana

This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.

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(317): This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me. http://tfl.nu/qrey

Replies (3) Good night (955) Bad night (432)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space

(262): View more from Wisconsin

Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man

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(262): I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space (262): Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man http://tfl.nu/r48t

Replies (1) Good night (691) Bad night (320)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke

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(832): My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke http://tfl.nu/shwp

Replies (2) Good night (375) Bad night (176)

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