you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
