Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
