I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Randomize
