Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
