hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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