WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
