I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
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"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
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if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
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